In a long-term relationship? Yes, you can still keep romance burning

• Published date: 10 February 2023
• Publication title: Business Mirror

One day you can't keep your hands off each other, and you're constantly finishing each other's sentences; the next, you find once-cute quirks annoying, and you're both more preoccupied with what's on your phones rather than what the other has to say. What happened to that intense, heady rush you felt at the beginning of your relationship when the mere presence of a person you couldn't stop thinking and talking about made you blush and weak in the knees?

While Hollywood movies condition us to believe that passionate love is forever, science will tell you that the euphoria of a fresh new romance lasts anywhere from six months to two years. 'It's a phase driven by hormones and chemicals in the brain, like dopamine and oxytocin, that trigger attraction, lust, and attachment,' explains Ma. Gia Grace B. Sison, MD, head of the MakatiMed Wellness Center of leading hospital Makati Medical Center (MakatiMed, www.makatimed.net.ph). 'Eventually, the levels of these feel-good hormones and chemicals taper, the so-called 'honeymoon period' is over, and that's when you see your partner for what he or she truly is.'

Years into a relationship could make you fall into a rut. Suddenly, places and activities that excite you become unexciting and predictable. Respective careers and personal interests can also take your time away from your partner. Longtime couples with kids tend to put romance in the backburner once the responsibilities of raising a family become the top priority.

But just because the honeymoon is over doesn't mean romance has to end too. 'The bottom line is this: Relationships are never static; they grow and evolve the way you and your partner do,' says Dr. Sison. 'They also need constant work, so if you want to revive the romance of your early days, you'll have to be proactive and in it together. Both of you have to want it.'

The best part? If your relationship has matured through the years, any romantic feelings you rekindle with your mate will no longer be fueled by infatuation but by honest and deep love.

Communicate. Spend time together-whether on a mid-week date without the kids, or an after-dinner...